August 25, 2015

Summerslam 2015 Examination and questions



It was one of the biggest events of the year, with amazing matches and truly wonderful moments, which exemplified why we love wrestling so much. But, enough about NXT Takeover: Brooklyn, we're here to discuss Summerslam 2015! So, I now present you, weary Wrestling fan, with The Timekeeper's initial reactions during the show, and of course opinions may change after re-watching certain moments. Not that anyone really cares about my blogging-self opinions. 

Jon Stewart's monologue
  • Ugh, an average stage set up. They just don't want to change the set again for RAW because it's in the same arena. But they've been using the same set for big events for a while.
  • Jon Stewart was one of the best guests for the WWE.
  • Keyword: was.
  • Maybe it's Mick Foley's fault? 
  • Mick Foley's beard is the biggest party of the summer. 
Randy Orton V.S Sheamus
  • A bathroom break to begin the show? I don't think that's how breaks work. 
  • Orton's bleeding. That's the brightest part of this match. 
  • Sheamus is whooping Randy's derriere.
  • Sheamus won.
  • Nice dominant finish. Go, get that interest back Sheamus.
Primetime players V.S The New Day V.S Los Matadores V.S The Lucha Dragons (WWE Tag team championship)


  • New day is too hot, singing empire state of positivity. 
  • I'd buy their album. Even if it was just forty-five minutes of them clapping.
  • Hey, Eden.  
  • I forgot that the Lucha dragons could win. I was just assuming that Primetime Players or New Day were the only possible winners. 
  • This is the best match so far. It's only the second, but the statement's still true.
  • Yes, Xavier, beat up El Torito.
  • YES, NEW DAY WON!
  • Best championship celebration EVER. Move over Bayley.
  • Please don't lose these belts New Day, don't ever let the Primetime players bring their negativity around you again. 
Dolph Ziggler (w/ Lana) V.S Rusev (w/ Summer Rae) 
  • Ziggler thinks he'll steal the show. Hahahaha!
  • Is Lana diming or Dolphing?
  • This match is a bit better than I expected.
  • Crush him Rusev. 
  • Double count out. This should've been a mixed tag in the first place anyway
Stardust and (Cosmic) King Barrett V.S Neville and Stephen Amell
  • All hail King Barrett, seriously.
  • Stardust's diming.
  • Amell needs to put that hood shirt back on. Not diming, no. 
  • Why is Amell getting decimated so badly? 
  • I want Stardust and Wade to please win. Please.
  • Neville and Amell won.
  • Neville pins Barrett while Amell looked like a star adjace (as Peter Rosenburg would say).
Ryback V.S Big Show V.S the Miz
  • Oh no, Miz is not diming. Of course his opposition aren't looking any better than him, so I guess he gets some points?
  • This triple threat is nice so far.
  • Big Show just did a (HORRIBLE) swanton. Show-ton? Double entendre? Like, the ton part is also a reference to his weight, oh forget it this is a horrible joke. But, enough about that swanton. 
  • I actually got hyped for Miz to win after his near fall on Ryback. 
  • ...come on Miz... i mean um... I have to be indifferent because there's no former Indy wrestlers in this match in order to be cool, right? We're supposed to be indifferent right? Okay I'll stop trying to enjoy the product which I'm a fan of. 
  • Ew, Ryback won. The ending was heelish of him though (Now that I think about it, I guess we ARE supposed to be indifferent in order to be sane).
Roman Reigns and Dean Ambrose V.S Bray Wyatt and Luke Harper
  • Whoa, Reigns and Ambrose making this match kind of hot right now.
  • Ambrose, silly man. Jumping off of tables and junk.
  • Spoiler: Bray loses BTW.
  • Reigns and Ambrose won.
  • Nobody turned on the other. 
  • Well that was a good RAW match. 
Seth Rollins V.S John Cena (WWE World Heavyweight Championship and US Championship) 

  • Things are gonna go from 15 to 16 real quick.
  • Wait, so Cesaro's going on later? Yay!
  • Is Rollins diming right now?! 
  • Rollins got some air with that frog splash. 
  • Nah, That figure 4 Cena did wasn't a tribute, that junk's just disrespectful. 
  • Is everyone just doing suicide dives tonight?
  • Rollins is just trying to survive (despite the suicide dives). 
  • Jon Stewart interference
  • Hmmm... he kind of gave away that he might have hit Cena. Should have just made it look like he'd hit Rollins then go and hit Cena. Not that I can tell anyone how to perform better. It's just a small thing. 
  • YES! 
  • I'm so happy that Cena didn't win. Oh, and Rollins won or whatever. But, let's not forget what's important here.
  • Oh, I forgot about the US title. 
  • I knew you wouldn't let us down Jon Stewart, sorry for doubting you earlier. 
  • Match of the night so far.
  • You can never fully enjoy these moments because you know Cena's going to get revenge.
Team Bella V.S Team P.C.B. V.S Team B.A.D. (Elimination triple threat 9-person tag team match)
  • Team B.A.D.'s gonna be overlooked in this match (and probably in general). 
  • I'm so glad Sasha's getting pops, like when she got tagged in. She's the one.
  • That dive/ jump out of the ring sequence didn't flow that well. (I think the Bellas actually had the best dive... did I just say Bellas and best within the same parentheses?) 
  • Stupid Tamina. She got the best Team eliminated.  
  • I'm guessing that Alicia's working a lot of this match because the Bellas aren't as versed in the ring as she is.
  • Team P.C.B. won
  • Becky actually scored the pin fall. Yay, she's getting some focus. Kinda. 
  • The match wasn't bad, but it's no Sasha Banks vs Bayley. Not, that it was supposed to be.  
  • Dear goodness was Sasha vs Bayley wonderful. Wrestling at it's finest. Anyway...
Kevin Owens V.S Cesaro
  • Owens doing two gruesome single matches on back to back nights.
  • Cesaro is amaaaayayyayyayzing he's a he's amaaaayayyayyayzing. 
  • Man, they're putting in work.
  • I think they tried to place a show stealing match in an appropriate time slot, but I think that when they try to book a "showstealer", it  doesn't always steal the show.
  • This is a good match, but it kind of feels like a cool down match, because of the high of the Rollins/Cena match and the anticipation for Lesnar/Taker. 
  • Owens won; a victory he deserved. Only downside is well... Cesaro had to lose.
Brock Lesnar V.S The Undertaker  
  • Undertaker, you should be diming. Why aren't you diming? 
  • Lesnar killing em'
  • Taker just went through the commentary table. CRINGE. TAKER, PLEASE BE OKAY!
  • Is Lesnar's forehead skin made out of Plastic wrap?
  • Lesnar, stop the suplexes, you're making me cringe. Cringe and or flinch, I'm not sure which.  
  • Blue pants city > suplex city
  • Taker just did a very crazy laugh at Brock Lesnar (Haha, It was muy gracioso), dude's not playing around tonight. 
  • He hit the last ride! Yay! 
  • Did Kane ring the bell? 
  • Undertaker's being very heel. Very, very heel.  
  • Lesnar bled and flipped off Taker before passing out? He must think this is a different era. One which may have consisted of attitude. 
  • Undertaker won. Via submission. And a little garnish of controversy. 
BEST ATTIRE: New Day, no doubt. That is, just the New Day, not the band No Doubt, because they didn't show up tonight. But, I'm sure they would've looked spiffy. Well, at least Gwen, not that I'd be able to name another member....   

BEST MATCH: Rollins V.S Cena. Taker V.S Lesnar was probably second best; it wasn't technical or anything like that, but it was fun. Well, aside from worrying about Taker not being okay.

BEST ENTRANCE: Uhhh... let's just go with SASHA BANK'S ENTRANCE FROM NXT TAKEOVER: BROOKLYN!
DON'T KILL 'EM, SASHA!


Thanks for reading and spending some time with me! God bless you fine people and comment if you're into that "type" of thing.